I let my son watch TV. There, I’ve said it. I also let him play games on my mobile. He isn’t, by any means, attached to a screen all day but he definitely watches TV way more often than is recommended. I’ve agonised over this quite often during the last three years but I’ve decided it’s time to let that guilt go and here are eight reasons why:
It’s educational
He mainly watches CBeebies and the majority of their shows have an educational element – whether that be numbers & shapes or foreign countries and animal care. I swear there are some skills he’s learnt entirely from the telly.
It’s teaching him about technology
We live in a technology-driven world and there is, sadly, no getting away from that, so knowing how to operate an iPhone at aged three isn’t exactly a disadvantage.
It’s age appropriate
Obviously I don’t sit there binge-watching old episodes of True Blood in front of him. He only watches shows and plays games appropriete for toddlers and preschoolers.
He is meeting all his targets
Most importantly, he is meeting every single one of his development targets and excelling in most. He isn’t overweight. So, in all honestly, I can’t see what damage the evil forces of excess screen time has so far done.
We have balance
Caterpillar is out of the house most days – whether that be attending nursery or out with me going to classes and groups or meeting friends and their children. When we are at home we draw, craft, talk, read & play so if after all that he watches several hours of TV I’m not going to beat myself up.
It’s impossible to keep them occupied entirely alone; we all need a break
I refuse to be a slave to my child. I will do my very best for him and I love him very much but I’m not physically or emotionally able to dedicate endless hours each day to play and activities. I need time for housework, my day job, blogging tasks etc. and if screens help occupy Caterpillar for a while then so be it.
Kids need downtime too
Modern parenting gurus would have us believe we should be engaging in actitivites, play and learning opportunities with our children every waking moment but firstly, this is impossible to maintain (if you’re a mum like me, at least, I guess some mums manage), secondly, our own parents certainly didn’t do this (and we’re just fine) and lastly, children need to relax too. Watching a movie or a TV show allows your child to rest and refresh their minds a little, especially useful before bed or nap time.
I’ve given up on guilt and parenting advice
I made a pact with myself a while back that I would endeavour to give up on Mum Guilt and ignore parenting advice (which is usually conflicted and from a questionable source anyway). We’re doing our own thing and so far that’s working out just fine.
So…what are your thoughts on the screen time debate?
Really interesting post as always. I watched some TV as a child and I’m fine. I don’t let my 7 month old watch it yet but he’s not that interested, he’s just perfected crawling so that’s all he wants to do. When he’s older I agree to will be a good way for him to relax and for me to get stuff done! #thelist
Yes to all of the above! I think the key is everything in moderation. Our screens are our saviours some days 🙂 #thelist
Emma recently posted…Killed by men, silenced by patriarchy
Hi Laura, as long as a child isn’t dependent on screen time and it’s not impacting their lives in a negative way, then I see no harm in it either. Times have changed and there is plenty of time in the day for a child to be able to do a bit of everything… And as for ‘parenting advice’. We must learn to follow our gut feeling and do what’s best for out own children.
xx
Debbie recently posted…St Dennis Day 2016 Wasn’t Quite A Washout!
I guess we can only hope to strike a balance between screen time and other activities. The episodes of Blaze I’ve downloaded onto my phone are a great way of stopping my grandchildren going to sleep in the car lol.
#PicknMix
suz recently posted…Planning my picture book video
The great screen time debate, as a mummy of a little boy with ASD we have never limited screen time or TV as its for him a safety net. But he does not watch it all day, he plays outside loads, he loves his lego. He told me he wants to write a game, his daddy writes games so its an area i am happy he has shown a real interest in #picknmix
Sarah – Mud Cakes and Wine recently posted…Pleached Trees – Higher Privacy Solution
Love this post and totally agree with it. With technology being so important in this day and age, I have no issue with my son spending time on tablets etc. In fact, he may only be almost 3 but he’s better with technology than me. CBeebies is educational and with amazing letter apps on the ipad, it’s helped him to learn to read, spell and count and there can’t be anything wrong with that can there? #pocolo
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I really feel guilty if I let my kids watch too much TV. But as we go through the school holidays, we seem to watch progressively more and more (as my energy drains!). I think I worry about it more than I should. I agree with all your points, but I still feel guilty! #PoCoLo
Lucy (@Lucy_at_home) recently posted…30 Reasons Why I Love Being A Young Mum
Both my children watch tv and play on the ipad, and I’m ok with that. It’s all in balance with various other activities, and they learn a lot from it too. x #TheList
Madeline (This Glorious Life) recently posted…10 reasons I’m happy Autumn is on its way
I think you’re post is really balanced and you’ve got it figured out. I think back to when our (my?) generation were growing up in the 80s and we were latch-key kids, there was no internet and no-one offering “helpful” advice apart from perhaps family or friends. I’m 36 now and spent a joyous childhood glued to as many 80s cartoons as I could with parents who both worked full-time. I also watched things like Dallas and Dynasty, which would probably be grounds for calling social-services these days. I’m now married, a home-owner, university-educated and in a great job. What I’m trying to say very long-windedly is that I do think people should just take a step back and relax every now and then. Great post X #PoCoLo
Lins @ Boo & Maddie recently posted…Breakfast at Maltby Street Market
Good for you Laura. Mine have always watched probably more TV than they should. My son (who is nearly 16) now plays more video games than watches TV. It is in the end a personal choice and as long as it works for you, I don’t think you should feel guilty. Parenting is a difficult thing.
Oh this makes me feel better. My 9 month old is poorly at the moment with a virus/fever thing that’s made her super cranky and clingy but not serious (so the doctor assures me!). In a desperate attempt to stop the crying I stuck peppa pig on the TV and lo and behold she was transfixed. She seemed the happiest she has for days and I was able to have 5 minutes respite. It’s my new favourite thing, but I have had the guilts as a result. Thank you for helping me put it all in perspective! #picknmix
This is such a very well thought out post. My children are older now (18, 15 and 10 years) and looking back i’m pretty sure that they watched too much TV. However, that was balanced with plenty of fresh air and exercise and conversation and they all seem to be turning out okay!! I agree, you sometimes just have to get on with things and the TV keeps them amused. I have personally learned loads from programmes like Horrible Histories! #PicknMix
Sharon Parry recently posted…Meningitis in students – what you need to know
I think there is too much drama and worry about screen time….As long as you find a balance it’s fine….My girls have been on their computers so much over the holidays but I don’t feel bad or guilty. I know when they go back to school they will only have an hour or so a day….
Great post x
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Hi Laura, I have always let my children watch TV and never stressed about it too much. Mine are older so the general rule is that during the week when they are at school they are not allowed to watch any TV until their homework is done and then never more than an hour. They both do a lot of extra curricular activities after school and at the weekends so some downtime in front of the TV is totally fine with me. Right now my y 13 yr old is upstairs catching up on her favourite TV shows as its such a gloomy day outside, giving me some sorely needed blogging time. #PoCoLo
I agree – everything in oideration!
I love reading about how other people are as relaxed about screen time as I am. Its saves my sanity. Totally agree as well that it is my sons chill out time after a long day at school. the good women of mumsnet would have you believe there is hardly a tv set in the country!
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Yes to all of this – as a work at home mum I couldn’t survive without screens! #picknmix
Crummy Mummy recently posted…Back to school essentials you didn’t know you need
Iggle Piggle has helped me out a lot since I had my 4 month old. My then 18 month old had her new brother to contend with for mum’s attention and it was so hard when I couldn’t look after her during the endless feeds. A bit of TV doesn’t do any harm, especially when the alternative means they are just left to wail and be upset all on their own. Good job on staying no to he mum guilt! We do indeed need some time to ourselves too!
Totally and utterly agree with you on this. There are so many ‘should do’ & ‘shouldn’t dos’ in parenting and I’m so sick of it. At the end of the day, you know your child and what’s best for them. We live in a modern age where TV & tablets are a part of everyday life. It’s time some people took a chill pill. Great post. #pocolo
Jaki recently posted…Are you a talker or a texter…?
it sounds like you’ve got the balance right
I also let my son watch TV, play pokemon go on my phone, watch youtube and he also code using Kano. I think that you are right that its educational and I really try hard to balance it with us always going out and playing as much as he watch and use tech. #pocolo
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Yes to all of those! My boys have learnt so much from having screen time. Everything in moderation I say! #picknmix
I agree with every word of this. Life is about balance at the end of the day, and kids need to switch off and unwind the same as we do as adults. Great post. Xxx
I have always been relaxed about screen time. nice to hear other parents with the same view.
#fartglitter
This sums up exactly how I feel about screen time, thank you so much for letting me know I’m not alone! xx #EatSleepBlogRT
Claire recently posted…Finding Your Calm Button
Good for you. This is a tough choice but as usual there probably isn’t a great deal of difference to the kid either way, so best to do what works for you as well! We promised no TV for Little Bear till he was two, before he was born, but it’s slowly creeping in on my more exhausted days. Only a matter of time!
#EatSleepBlogRT
I have written about kids watching TV in my day in the life of a child minder post and another on addicted tablets
I let my daughter watch tv and she also loves just looking at photos and videos on my phone (mainly of her) so we let her of course! it keeps her entertained while i prepare dinner and gives her time to focus if she can! I like cbbebies as they are no averts…thanks for sharing #eatsleepblogRT
Not Just Phoebe recently posted…My Sunday Photo 4th September – Morning Walk
You are the expert when it comes to what your child needs. Bugger screen time rules do what you need. My son needs his screen to avoid sensory overload. #EatSleepBlogRT
An imperfect mum (Catie) recently posted…Gamer Zone #6: Pokemon Go
We are sat in front of the TV as I comment! I must admit I do worry about too much screen time and it’s mainly morning and evening but there are days when we are tired and it comes on more. Like you I pick educational stuff and we are usually so busy, there’s nursery and playing around it! This post has made me feel better xx #fartglitter
Sarah Howe @runjumpscrap recently posted…Why I’m Not Having a Birth Plan
Totally agree. Way too many do’s and don’ts nowadays.
Along as you find a balance I can’t see a problem 🙂 x
I’m pretty pro-screen time these days. The Popple isn’t allowed much of it (unless she’s ill, when all rules go out the window), but she does watch a bit most days for all the reasons you said. She mostly watches Spanish-language music videos and we’re raising her bilingual, so it’s kind of educational. Also it gives me a moment of quiet sometimes when I DESPERATELY need it. It’s all about balance, isn’t it? As long as you don’t sit your kid in front of the TV for hours on end, it’s probably okay. #EatSleepBlogRT
Squirmy Popple recently posted…An apology to stay-at-home mums
I love this post. Screen time is my biggest Mummy Guilt! I remember doing the unspeakable and “googling” it when my oldest was around 12 months old and already quite a dedicated fan of Peppa Pig. I came away devastated that I had “broken my baby”” with the nasty telly. Then she grew up a bit to be a happy, well developled 4 year old and in the meantime her little brother happened and I kind of chilled out about it all a bit. I’m with you – “everything in moderation and make sure it’s age appropriate”. Otherwise I really try not to stress about it now. It’s great to hear that I’m in good company though. Thanks for linking with #fartglitter x
Rhyming with Wine recently posted…#happylittlebuttons – Our New Instagram Community
Love this post; agree whole-heartedly! Could’ve written it myself – I feel the same way. Still feel guilty at times, but my Little Man is also learning so much from the TV – new words and phrases and meanings, I’m now not so hard on myself about it:)
#FartGlitter
I wholeheartedly agree with you on every point!
There is no way that we can parent for an entire day on our own without some kind of TV rest-bite, and as you quite rightly point out, as long as they aren’t watching KillBill or the like then actually it can be quite educational.
As for games on mobiles and tablets: yes yes and yes. they learn how to operate them at school so I don’t see anything wrong with learning how to follow instructions from a device whilst ‘playing’. actually they are constantly learning – as long as it isn’t Grand Theft Auto I suppose…
Long live technology, and long may it occupy the hell lout of my kids when hey are having one tantrum too many.
big love
xx
#fartglitter
Love your honesty – I think this will always be a touchy subject. I’m not bothered either way about how much tv my son watches. He doesn’t watch loads, but it is generally always on in the background while he is playing with his toys. I am a bit strict about phones – my son loves the camera on mine and can take a selfie so I do let him play with it, but I’m wary of allowing him to use it for games/tv as I have seen the effect on kids around me who are quite dependent on devices! But as you point out, they are being brought up in a technological world, so will need to know how to use such things when they are older anyway. Plus I would be a total hypocrite as I am permanently attached to my phone #fartglitter
Something About Baby recently posted…Times to Treasure – Week 3
This is interesting. As a Mum to young teenagers my view is rather different. Left to their own devices my two would not emerge from their laptops and I am not sure everything they see is educational or age specific – but screens are the way of the world now and I only hope I can help them to learn that there is a wonderful world outside of that rectangular box too #pocolo
Rosie (@greenrosielife) recently posted…Veg, Fruit and Foraged Foods in Season in September
I rely on TV more than I’d like, but agree it’s certainly not all bad! I always monitor what they watch and think CBeebies is brilliant. x #EatSleepBlogRT
Becky at PinksCharming recently posted…REVIEW: A Beautiful Wooden Wrist Watch from JORD
I don’t have a set screen time for the boys. They are pretty physical spending plenty of time on sports and playing outside. If I think they’ve been watching to for too long I will suggest something else, but somedats we love snuggling up together to watch a film. Thanks for linking to #picknmix
Great post – I don’t think it hurts kids to have some down time with the TV. Like you we do activities, we go to the park, we do crafts but there are only so many hours in the day you (and the kids) can handle this kind of full on stimulation. #EatSleepBlogRT
Petite Pudding recently posted…A Sticky Bum and The Soy Sauce Disaster of 2016
My two watch quite a bit of TV (age appropriate) and i don’t see that being a problem. They are at school all week and most weekends were busy anyway. They are limited on playing on their tablets though as i think they are quite intense. #EatSleepBlogRt
Rachel (Lifeofmyfamilyandme) recently posted…September begins with new changes
Ah, mum guilt! Yes we allow CBeebies too. And I think you’re right, there are definitely some facts which she has learned/remembered from seeing it on TV. Every now and then I think about maybe having a few TV-free days…but the truth is, sometimes twenty minutes in front of the TV while I get a job done/have a cuppa is a lifesaver! #EatSleepBogRT
I’ve never been much for the parenting “advice”, we all parent in our own way. My boys watch far too much TV and play too much on their iPads, but then so do I so I can’t really tell them they’re not allowed can I? When I think my boys have watched enough I’ll tell them so and they’ll listen (for the most part) but I agree, giving up on that guilt is definitely worth doing.
Thanks for linking to #pocolo
Morgan Prince recently posted…Cute anniversary gifts your Hubby will love
This is a well balanced post and I agree with your points. I’ve never thought too much about screen time. The screen time of my children differs. They love to play outside on a trampoline and we are regularly at football or swimming clubs so if it’s a rainy day and they want to watch movies for most of the day, then I allow it. I mean they like to read and colour, play with play doh or kinetic sand and bake too but sometimes you have jobs that need doing and would much rather them be calm and watching age-appropriate TV as you suggest. Good on you! 🙂
Thanks for your honest take on screen time! I know I had it as a kid and we didn’t have half the techno-crap that is out there now! Good for you for using it properly. Sometimes we do need a break and that is okay. Thanks for this. M’wah! <3 <3 <3 #FartGlitter
Lisa Pomerantz recently posted…Car Seats and Kids: Both the 2-legged and 4-legged kind
Completely agree with you! I wrote a similar post last year.
I love his post I completely agree I let my toddler play cbeebies games I do draw a line at you tube though
Left Back recently posted…National Poetry Day
Really enjoyed this! It’s all about the balance isn’t it I feel the same. I’ll think, well we’ve walked, played and cycled today – he can watch some telly while I catch up on the laptop (or give the baby some time!).
Thanks for being so honest and scrapping my guilt traces too.
Kimberly x
I don’t have children and I wasn’t sure I should comment until the last paragraphs when you said “our own parents certainly didn’t do this (and we’re just fine)”. My mother, a single parent, worked from home so she could take care of me, she played with me and was supervising my activities while keeping an eye on her work. I didn’t watch TV as a child, more than 30 minutes a day or so. Those activities with her and how we were playing are the best memories I have from childhood.and I think those are the best moments she had as a mother too.
I beat myself up constantly about the amount of screen time my eldest has, for him it’s his xbox that worries me. The trouble is, with working from home it’s difficult to occupy them without screens and still be able to get work done. I have to work to pay the bills so what do I do?! I reassure myself that i only work a couple of hours in the morning then we’re out or doing things together so that’s some weight off but I still feel guilty!
I love this!
My girls are 10 yrs apart and require very different entertainment, attaching them to tech is pretty much the only peace & quiet/work time I get during the hols so definitely no judgement here.
Tammy x
Yes yes yes! I do find myself feeling the mum guilt sometimes but actually my kids are well rounded and we do plenty of family activities. Plus it’s never going to be like our childhoods!
Exactly, everything in moderation I say x
Love this, basically my approach too!
Hi Laura,
Thanks for sharing this informative content.I get more ideas from it.